But what does that mean?

Every self help guru will tell you to “love yourself” or [tag-tec]practice “self-love” [/tag-tec]first before you can love others. Do you even really know what those terms mean? Perhaps sometimes you think you do, but how often at the very same time you don’t seem to like yourself much. Do you wonder how you can love what you don’t like?

Regardless of how you currently feel about yourself, continue reading and discover how to love yourself in ways that will bring much more [tag-tec]happiness[/tag-tec] and satisfaction into your life.

[tag-tec]Relationships[/tag-tec] should be filled with fun, closeness, caring, and happiness, right? We think so and we know that when you focus on these qualities you will experience much more of them in your relationships. But first, you must be able to see them in yourself. Whether you are single, married, or divorced, all your relationships will be improved when you truly know and love yourself for who you really are.

We will address three important steps that you can take to move toward self-love and mastering the art of happiness.

Step one: Examine how you think. So much of what we feel about ourselves is determined by what we think about our lives in general. From the time we are small children, our parents raise us to focus on “right” and “wrong.” This can lead to thinking that you might be “wrong” or there is something “wrong” with you. Examine your thoughts carefully. You can do this when you use your emotions as a warning. Each time you feel discomfort of any kind, do your best to discover what you were thinking just before you started feeling that way.

Step two: Find out what is most important to you. You will be amazed at the changes you can make in your life once you discover what is most important to you. By focusing your attention on the important things, you will quickly turn your life around and get closer to not only self-love, but authentic happiness. Often the things that are most important are hidden deep beneath our everyday negative feelings. After you have completed the first step and examined how you think, you can begin to take the next step and uncover your values. Identifying how you think and then identifying what is most important can help you channel your energies effectively toward making your life better.

Feelings of sadness, confusion, or anger are just covering up values that are missing in a situation. When you are feeling sad confused or angry it’s almost impossible to practice self-love. Identifying your undiscovered values can help you notice amazing parts of you that you can easily like and then learn to love.

For instance, beneath sadness, there is probably some sort of regret about losing hope in a dream. Underneath confusion is a desire for understanding. Within anger, there might be a need for caring.

Step three: When you truly know yourself, you’re never alone. Any time you find yourself lonely or feeling sorry for yourself, know that you can be your own best friend by remembering to stop, identifying what you value underneath your feelings, and take time to appreciate yourself–you are an amazing human being that values beautiful things. So start practicing these self-love techniques and get on your way to mastering the true art of happiness today.

Until next time…

With love,
Beth and Neill

Turn Obstacles Into Opportunities to [tag-tec]Be Happy[/tag-tec]

Do you have multiple obstacles standing in the way between you and your[tag-tec] happiness[/tag-tec] ? Do you seem to constantly sell yourself short, and assume that you are not good enough to get what you want?

This type of thinking may be the biggest obstacle between you and your success.

Worrying that you are not good enough or smart enough or lucky enough to get what you want is what many refer to as “limiting beliefs.” We develop limiting beliefs from previous experiences that didn’t turn out as we hoped or expected.

Past Experiences Create Future Expectations

Every time an undesirable outcome happens, we can develop a new limiting belief or reinforce an old one. As we continue this pattern of thinking, we get farther and farther away from success, and the possibility of being truly happy.

“To grow, you must be willing to let your present and future be totally unlike your past. Your history is not your destiny.” ~Alan Cohen

In order to start changing these harmful patterns of thinking, you must learn to first identify them.

As a way to practice identifying this pattern, try this. As soon as you feel the first hints of any discomfort and doubt, use these feelings as a warning signal and immediately stop what you are doing to attend to these feelings and explore the desires within them.

Conscious Thoughts Create New Possibilities

Discovering the truth behind your limiting beliefs is the next step. For this, identify what it is that you “do” want–what’s missing that causes you to perpetuate this belief. Then take actions that will help you start experiencing these things in your life.

These are two simple steps that start you down the path towards a future filled with happiness and success.

Until next time…