Happy, Healthy Relationships – Whose Responsibility Is It?
When Does 50 Plus 50 Still Equal 50?
You’ve probably heard it said that for a relationship to work, it has to be 50/50?
Well, it’s a myth that happiness and satisfaction can only come from a 50/50 relationships-where each person contribute equally-doing their 50% to make the relationship work.
You can spot people who believe this myth in all kinds of relationships: between friends, romantic partners, family members and business colleagues. Belief in this myth is a major reason why people find themselves dissatisfied and frustrated about their relationships.
Why? Because if we expect the other person to do their 50% and they don’t do it, we become disappointed and upset. As soon as one person starts keeping score to make sure the other person is doing their 50%, it becomes very difficult to have a relationship that’s happy and satisfying.
We suggest that you stop spending your time making sure the other person is completing their 50% and instead, start being 100% responsible for your happiness and satisfaction in the relationship.
We know this is a radical idea, but when we pass on the responsibility for our satisfaction and control of our feelings to anyone or anything “out there”, we limit our power and the possibilities for our happiness. We may want to be happy, but we’ve put our happiness in the hands of other people.
Be 100% Responsible
Being 100% responsible means you never give up, and never give in on anything that is important to you. If something is missing in your relationship, what can you do to make sure you get it? If something’s happening in your relationship you don’t like, what can you do to change how it’s happening?
Don’t ever leave your ability to have a satisfying relationship in anyone else’s hands. If a healthy, happy relationship is what you’re looking for, start creating 100% relationships with yourself and others today.
How do you start? By noticing if you pay more attention to whether the other person is doing their 50%. If you do, stop and identify what’s happening that you’re not enjoying, what it is that you do want to happen, and figure out one thing you can do to get what you want.