What to Do Now?
During traumatic times in your life, everything can seem completely out of control. Everything that you always thought was “normal” gets called into question. It’s hard to know what to do, what is right, where to turn. Going through a divorce is considered to be one of the greatest life stresses anyone must endure. Those who are trying to recover are often left wondering how to heal a broken heart, in addition to any other problems like finances, children, jobs, or other responsibilities.
Being able to survive a divorce-and even come out stronger than before-is possible. Even if you were the partner initiating the divorce proceedings, it’s hard to come to terms with it. But, you can actually recreate your life into one that meets your needs and may even exceed your expectations. Here are five tips to get you pointed in the right direction for divorce recovery.
Survival and Recovery Tips:
1. Take care of yourself-In order to take care of your business, whether that means your children, your finances, or your job, you will need to take care of yourself first. Without keeping yourself together, you won’t be any good to anyone else.
2. Take time to feel good-Including pleasure in your life is important, not only during times of high stress, but always. Everyone needs to treat themselves now and then. Be sure to continue doing things you enjoy, or find some new things you like. Some people find that making a wish list of 10 things they love doing and then 10 things they would like to try keeps them moving forward.
3. Seek comfort from others-Going through a divorce process can leave a person feel extremely lonely. Remember that you can always count on yourself, and you will need to do this more and more to get through. Finding out that you are your own best friend can be incredibly empowering. This is an opportunity to reflect and identify what is most important to you. Once you understand these values, you will be better equipped to deal with the difficult feelings that you are faced with.
Divorce might mean the loss of something you might have dreamed of, and you might be judging yourself as a failure. But soon you will learn to search deeper within those feelings and find yourself and make your life what you need and want it to be. Divorce support is often only a phone call away, from either a caring friend or a professional counselor.
4. What lies ahead?-A fast recovery from a divorce requires careful planning for the future. When you can start imagining and visualizing what your life will look like, and create a clear view of what you need to get from life, you will be able to take the next steps. When you focus your attention on your goals, they have a tendency to materialize.
5. Miracles can happen-Sometimes when we are at our lowest points, miracles can occur. As you examine your life, look for the little things that you might have taken for granted before. Despite the fact that you may be surrounded by chaos, take every chance you can to enjoy a peaceful moment, a sunset, a favorite television show, or a quiet game with your kids. It’s time to reconnect with friends, lose weight, or pick up a new hobby! Appreciating all the things you do have in your life is definitely an important step in the divorce recovery process.
Beth and Neill